A Glimpse To The Past
by Tachyon II
Summary: Kathryn has an opportunity to peek into her own past, which she hasn't lived before.
1. Kathryn's wild ride

"Come on Kathryn", Phoebe pleaded. "We haven't had a proper sister-to-sister time at all yet. I think it would be about the time to have some."

"I agree, but does it have to be this…"

"Exhibition of Extraordinary Extraterrestrial Exemplars."

"Right. In another words; an exhibition of humbug. Couldn't we do something a little more… sophisticated?" Kathryn asked. "Like going to some nice café in Paris or…"

"Boring!", Phoebe exclaimed. "What is so special about going to have a cup of coffee? This exhibition is on Earth for the first time ever. Humbug or not, this could actually be fun!".

"This Exhibition of Extraordinary…."

"…Extraterrestrial Exemplars", Phoebe added. "It opens today and I am sure there will be plenty of people there. We would blend in the crowd nicely."

Kathryn sighed until said: "I just hope I don't get any Extraordinary Exanthema from this."

"So we can go?", Phoebe asked with her eyes gleaming.

"Yes."

"This will be fun, Kathryn!"

"Fun? You start to sound more like Neelix every day."

"Very funny", Phoebe said as she was already heading towards the door. "Are you coming?"

* * *

Kathryn looked around. The exhibition had certainly assembled a lot of curious people around. There were numerous booths and tents around them, and music mixed with buzz of conversations filled the air. Kathryn saw it as almost like a carnival of some sort.

"That poor Bolian actually tried to get us to believe that the item he had was some kind of rare thing from the deep ends of Gamma Quadrant", Phoebe laughed and rolled her eyes.

"I just wish you wouldn't have described me as "a rare item from the deep ends of Delta Quadrant", Kathryn said and smiled.

"Well, the point was to inform him that I am not that gullible as he thought", Phoebe said.

"He wanted me to give him a strand of my hair!" Kathryn cried out with a smile.

"Well, you are "The Great Delta Quadrant Captain", so what did you expect?"

"I expected not ending up being one of the "Extraordinary Extraterrestrial Exemplars" of this exhibition."

"Well you are not really extraterrestrial on this planet, so there is no fear of that", Phoebe informed smiling and took her sister's arm.

They walked for a while, observing and wondering the buzz around them. Kathryn smiled. She had started to enjoy the exhibition more than she had anticipated. The sun was shining, she was with Phoebe, and there were no earthly worries in sight. She was glad that Phoebe had persuaded her to come.

Suddenly their path was blocked by two young men who had just appeared from dark blue tent on their right side.

"That was amazing!" one of them said with eyes wide open. "Unreal!"

"Where did it take you?" the other asked.

"Excuse me", Phoebe interrupted and gave the young the men her glance of disapproval.

"Oh, sorry", the one in red shirt said and blushed. Then he stepped aside.

"You should try that one!", the other suggested and directed his finger at the tent.

"Are you talking to us?" Phoebe asked.

"Yes. You should definitely try that. It's unreal!"

"What's in there?" Phoebe asked.

"Find out, ma'am!" the one in red shirt said and then they continued their way, discussing enthusiastically with each other, until disappearing in the crowd.

"Ma'am? Did he just call me ma'am?" Phoebe asked and looked Kathryn.

"What is in the tent?" Kathryn asked and stepped closer to the sign, which was placed next to the entrance. "Experience the alternative reality?" she read from the sign.

"Alternative reality?" Phoebe asked.

"It must have something to do with holo-technology", Kathryn suggested.

"You are mistaken", said the Ferengi who had just stepped out from the tent.

"Excuse me?" Kathryn asked.

"My exemplar has nothing to do with holo-technology. I wouldn't let people pay me from some cheap trick they could experience in any holodeck on the block."

"Really?" Phoebe asked and raised her other eyebrow.

"Come in and see it for yourself", the Ferengi suggested.

"And how much is this going to cost us?" Phoebe inquired.

"We can discuss the price inside."

Kathryn and Phoebe exchanged looks.

"Why not?" Phoebe asked. "Those boys seemed to be pretty excited about it."

"I thought we were only looking around."

"Why just to look around when you can try out something, which could be without a doubt the most unique experience of your life?" the Ferengi asked.

"Hmm-mm", Kathryn replied.

"Okay", Phoebe said then. "We'll take a look."

"Phoebe…" Kathryn whispered.

"Come on, Kathryn. What harm could it do?"

Kathryn thought for a moment until she realized it was too late to start debating with her sister. Phoebe happened to be almost as stubborn as she was herself. "Fine", Kathryn finally said.

"Okay", Phoebe stated with a spark in her eyes and entered the tent Kathryn following her closely behind.

Ferengi closed the curtain after them and walked to the small round table in the middle of the tent. He sat down on one of the three stools, and Kathryn and Phoebe sat down as well. Kathryn looked around. It was dim, almost dark, and the air in the tent felt very thick and warm. Then the Ferengi lifted something from the ground and placed it on the table. He removed the cloth and what Kathryn and Phoebe saw was some kind of small device.

"What is that?" Phoebe asked.

"This, my friends, is the "Kojé", which I was fortuitous to have in my hands by accident."

"Oh?" Kathryn asked.

"I was told this has originated… from the deep ends of the Gamma Quadrant!"

"Really?" Kathryn asked and rolled her eyes. "Are you sure it's not from the Delta Quadrant?"

"Delta Quadrant?" Ferengi asked bedazzled. "I don't know anyone who's been in Delta Quadrant. If you don't count the Borg. Or that one Starfleet ship… what it was called…?"

"Voyager?" Phoebe suggested and contained her smile.

"Yes, it was called something like that, wasn't it?"

"So what does that thing on the table do?" Phoebe asked then.

Ferengi looked at them for a moment intensively. Then he started to talk with low, enigmatic way.

"This will give you the access to your own history, which never happened", he told and looked at the sisters below his lobes.

"A-ha", Kathryn stated unimpressed.

"Don't be too sceptical", Ferengi said, now without a trace of mysteriousness in his voice.

"What do you mean by history that never happened?" Phoebe asked.

"Our reality, this one righ here, is merely only a result of one chain of events in the universe", Ferengi started and emphasized his words by gesturing with his hands. " Even the smallest, the most petty decisions, have an affect on how our lives take form, and what events we experience. Now you have a unique opportunity to see what kind of live would have been also possible. This device, ladies, allows you to peek into your past and to see what other ways your lives could have evolved. Or…"

"Or?" Kathryn asked.

"Or it just simply takes you back to the timeline that already has happened."

"I see", Kathryn said briefly.

"Well, this timeline is one of the many possible timelines in our universe", Ferengi explained. "Therefore it is possible that you can end up seeing what has already happened. But it is much more likely that you will see some other alternative reality… or history in this case."

"Sounds… fascinating", Phoebe said.

"And what does this experience cost?" Kathryn asked then.

"Well, I negotiate on the prices with each customer individually."

"So, what would you ask for a payment, if I were to "peek" into another timeline?"

"Phoebe", Kathryn cut off calmly. She didn't want Phoebe to do something so hastily. She felt that they should give this more thought.

"Come on, Kathryn. Give this a benefit of the doubt. Wouldn't you want to see how your life would have turned out if you weren't been… on your 'trip'?"

Kathryn didn't reply and Phoebe knew instantly that her sister was genuinely interested, too. Who wouldn't have been? If the Ferengi told them the truth, the experience was certainly worth exploring.

"Well, I'll tell you what", Ferengi said then. "One of you can try this out here and now, and if you are taken back to the timeline, which is the one here and now, I won't collect any compensation."

"Sounds reasonable", Phoebe stated and watched her sister.

"But don't you ladies go out there and tell people that I have agreed to done this for you. I got the reputation to protect and I'm sure this sudden act of 'charity' from my part breaks at least dozens of rules of acquisitions that I am aware of, and dozens that I cannot remember right now."

"We won't tell anyone", Phoebe assured.

"So which one of the ladies would it be?" Ferengi asked then.

"Her", Phoebe informed and nodded towards Kathryn. "She should definitely be the one."

Kathryn looked Phoebe trying to look disapproval, but Phoebe was able to see right through her and therefore she winked playfully.

"Alright", Ferengi said. "You will have to put this to your head", he said then and handed what seemed to be some kind of headphones with a visor.

Kathryn placed the thing on her head and waited.

"Now… when you make the jump, you will feel like being part of the happenings you observe. I will keep you there for ten minutes of your Earth time. Then I will disconnect you."

"Understood", Kathryn said.

"And there will be no harm for her by doing this", Phoebe asked. "Neurological or other kind?"

"I have never seen this doing any harm on any species and the men who just left before you seemed to feel just fine."

"They were fine", Phoebe said to Kathryn.

"Switch it on", Kathryn suggested then.

"You will have to give me some timeframe, where you want to be taken."

"Umm… five years ago. That was my second year on… the long trip that I made", Kathryn said then.

"Five years it is", Ferengi stated and that was the last thing Kathryn heard before a flash of white light almost blinded her.

* * *

Kathryn looked around. She was on a small vessel, on a space ship of some kind. She looked down and saw herself wearing the shirt of her Starfleet uniform, but without the jacket. She lifted her left hand and felt a tight bun on the top of her head.

"Amazing…", she whispered.

She looked around again. She heard people talking somewhere nearby. Where was she? What ship was this? Was she on the mission of some kind? Then she took her right hand on her neck and became to realize that she wasn't wearing her four rank pips. She wasn't a captain anymore? Why?

Kathryn sighed, turned around and saw a panel. She touched the surface of it and the panel was instantly activated.

"Captain", she heard a whisper on her right side.

She lifted her head and saw Tom Paris walking towards her. The sight of his face made her instantly realize that there was a chance she was still in Delta Quadrant.

"Tom?" she asked, but then she remembered that she was witnessing the series of events where the others already knew her to be part of, where everything was normal to them.

"Tom", Kathryn heard a familiar voice behind her. "Go and give B'Elanna a hand."

"Fine…", Tom agreed, but very begrudgingly.

Kathryn turned around and saw Chakotay standing right behind her. He was out of his uniform, wearing similar outfit than before he became part of her crew. Suddenly Kathryn got an idea. What if this was Chakotay's ship? What if Voyager had been destroyed? Kathryn looked at Chakotay again who was still gazing at her. She quickly realized that his looked at her very closely, perhaps even too closely. Or more closely than she had accustomed to.

Kathryn turned around. She quickly concluded that the Ferengi device must have taken her to a timeline where she was still indeed in Delta Quadrant, but on Chakotay's vessel. How many of her crew had survived? Not many, since Chakotay's Maquis ship wasn't big enough to carry them all. Suddenly Kathryn felt a presence very near to her. Chakotay had stepped closer to her, closer than what was considered to be appropriate between crewmates. At least on her ship.

"So…", she heard him murmuring in her ear and his proximity baffled her. It got her heart pounding faster, which was not typical of her at all. "Have you given my terms more consideration?" he asked.

"Your terms?" Kathryn asked trying to maintain her voice as calm and neutral as possible.

"Oh… we are playing the curt one again", he said softly. "Alright then."

Next thing she knew was his hands in her hair.

"I have told you many times already that I want you to wear your hair down", he informed then, but still quietly.

Kathryn didn't know what to say. She had no idea what was going on, but she certainly knew that the parameters of their friendship were very different in this timeline. Suddenly she felt her long hair dropping on her back. She actually felt the weight of them; that was how real the experience was for her.

"What are you doing?" she managed to ask.

"Showing you your place… '_captain_'", he said bluntly. "Reminding you how I prefer you to be under my command."

Kathryn's heart raced even faster. She had suddenly started to feel insecure. She tried hard to think what to say or do, but she was quickly interrupted once she felt hands on her hips.

"Do I really need to remind you of my terms?", he asked then his face in her hair.

Kathryn felt the warm wave on her blushing cheeks. Her long repressed desires flooded her and she didn't know what to do.

"I guess I have to remind you about the terms once again", he murmured.

"I guess you do", she managed to reply with a whisper.

"You will gain some influence on this ship when you have spent a night in my bunk", he whispered and pulled her pelvis against his. "When you have asked to be there, when you have pleaded."

Kathryn lost her breath. All of her thoughts merged into a blur of mixed emotions. Then she felt a soft kiss in her neck. She closed her eyes and felt a warm rush between her legs. The sensation surprised her and she knew she should have resisted. Someone could see them. But when she felt Chakotay's lips and the tip of his tongue caressing her skin, she became powerless. She wanted him to continue.

"Will you spent your night with me?" he asked then softly. "Are you coming tonight?"

Kathryn wasn't able to form an answer. All she felt was his left arm touching her inner thigh and working its way up, until three of his fingers pressed against the aching point between her legs. Kathryn sighed. Somehow he knew exactly where to touch and how.

"Chakotay!" someone called from behind.

The tension between them broke and he quickly eased his firm grip on her. Kathryn gasped. She felt her cheeks burning and heart racing.

"We are approaching the orbit", a female voice informed.

"Good. Let me know when we are ready to transport", Chakotay said.

"Alright…"

"Was there anything else?" Chakotay asked.

At that point Kathryn realized she knew the female voice. She turned around and saw Seska standing next to a bulkhead. Kathryn swallowed. It felt strange to see her after all these years, but there she was, like she had never passed away in the first place. Kathryn saw Seska staring at her, intensely and without a trace of kindness.

"Seska?" Chakotay asked.

"No", she finally said. "Nothing else for now."

Chakotay nodded and turned around to face Kathryn.

"I see you later", he said then until left.

Kathryn sighed and leaned back against the wall.

* * *

The planet they were orbiting was M-Class and Chakotay had ordered almost everyone down to collect anything eatable. Once transported down, Kathryn had seen only handful from her Voyager crew among the group. There were Tom, Harry and Rollings from her bridge staff, and few others from engineering and other departments. She had concluded that almost two years had passed since the events of the Caretaker, but that hadn't stopped her former crew calling her 'captain', even though Chakotay was the boss in their small crew. Kathryn wondered what her position was. It was clear that Chakotay hadn't give her much of authority, but it was also clear that there were specific terms to gain some.

Kathryn walked away from the others a basket in her hands. She wanted to be alone for a moment, to collect her thoughts. She kneeled down beside a small bush and picked one orange fruit in her hands. This would have happened if Voyager had been destroyed? They would travel across Delta Quadrant with Chakotay's little ship? Or were they? Seska in her timeline had suggested an alliance with the Kazon. Had Chakotay made an alliance? Were they on the journey towards Alpha Quadrant or were they just circling around the Delta Quadrant without any intention to reach Earth?

"Hey", she heard behind her.

She turned around and saw Chakotay standing nearby.

"Hi", she managed to say.

"You're hair", he said then. "I said I want to see it down."

"I like to keep it this way", Kathryn informed.

"Well I don't like it that way" he said then almost playfully.

"It is my hair", she said briefly while Chakotay stepped closer to her. "What are you doing?" Kathryn asked and felt her heart quicken its beats again.

Chakotay dropped the basked he had been carrying, kneeled down and pushed Kathryn against the ground, and placed himself on top of her.

"Stop", Kathryn asked.

But he didn't listen. He opened her hair again until pressed his lips against hers. He was impudent, dominating, and Kathryn didn't like to be told. She turned her face away from him. This was not how their relationship used to be and she refused to obey his adolescent demands.

"Quit playing already", he managed to whisper. "Give in already."

Already? This has been going on for some time now? Chakotay kissed her neck again, which was the right trick to make her weak. Kathryn closed her eyes. She was trying hard to deny the pleasure he succeeded to give her by doing this, but it was futile. Her body was responding to his touch and it made all rational thoughts to vanish, leaving only emotions to deal with.

"I know you want me, Kathryn", he murmured. "You have wanted me for a long time now. Just let it happen… "

"Stop…", she tried to protest, but without succeeding.

"Let it happen", he said and pressed his lips against hers.

They kissed, hungrily and passionately. Once she unintetionally revealed her own aching needs by moaning, Chakotay's touches got even more demanding and passionate. She felt his hand finding a way underneath her shirt. Then he spread her legs, and she let him do that willingly, and placed himself between them. She took her other hand from his hair and placed it below his waist. She wanted to feel it, she needed to, and quickly she did so. She felt his erection against the palm of her hand. Chakotay broke off the kiss.

"Are you coming tonight?" he asked then.

"What?" Kathryn managed to ask.

"Do you want to come tonight?" he asked and nibbled gently the tip of her left ear.

Then his hand found its way on her breast and he started to toy with already hardened nipple with his fingertips. Kathryn closed her eyes. She had never wanted anyone as much as she wanted him right now.

"Are you coming?" he asked again, but now more demanding than before. "Are you?"

"Yes…", she finally managed to tell him.

He kissed her again. Both of them were busy exploring each other, touching to find out which way to touch more.

"Are you?" he asked again.

"Yes…"

"You want to come?"

"Yes…"

Chakotay kissed her one more time and looked deep in her eyes. What she saw was lust, but also deep affection she already knew. She had seen that one before, many times.

"See you tonight", he said then and let her go.

Kathryn was puzzled. What was this? Was he leaving?

"Where are you going?" she asked.

"We have some foodstuffs to collect", he stated briefly as he got up to his feet.

Kathryn couldn't believe her ears. He was actually leaving? What was this? Was he just toying with her? Was this some kind of game to him? Kathryn wondered what to do or say. She would most certainly not let him know how irritated she was, how frustrating his juvenile game was to her, but she quickly realized she wasn't able to hide it either.

"Maybe I won't come tonight", she snapped then.

Chakotay turned around and smiled.

"You will", he said then.

"You seem to be quite sure."

"I am", he said and smiled. "You finally kissed me back today so I know now for certain that you desire this as much as I have desired the whole time. So if it's not tonight, it will be soon."

Then he turned his back on her again and left. He just walked away without looking back. Kathryn got up to her feet and threw her long hair back from her face. Then she kicked the empty basket that she had been carrying.

"Angry?" she heard a voice nearby.

She turned her head and saw Seska standing under a tree nearby.

"Seska", she said.

"Janeway", Seska replied disdainfully and started walking towards her.

"What do you want, Seska?" Kathryn asked.

"I want you to back off", she spitted sourly and hit Kathryn to her face. "If you go to his bunk tonight, you're dead."

Kathryn felt a burning sensation on her cheek where Seska's hand had hit her.

"You have sex with him and I will kill you", she said and left.

Suddenly Kathryn saw a blinding white flash in her eyes. She closed her eyes for a moment, and once she opened them again, she realized seeing a Ferengi in front of him.

"How was it?" Phoebe asked with a hand on Kathryn's shoulder.

Kathryn sighed. She was speechless.

"Well?"

"How long was I connected?" Kathryn finally managed to ask.

"Ten minutes like we agreed", Ferengi told.

"It felt a lot longer than that", Kathryn said.

"Well, what was it like? Where were you?" Phoebe asked.

"I was there… where I was five years ago, but the circumstances were very different. Did I… did I say anything or…"

"No. You were just sitting and sighing few times, but that was it. I, on the other hand, had the most interesting ten minute debate about commerce with our host here."

Kathryn nodded, smiled faintly, and rubbed her templates.

"Yes, yes. You can tell all about it later", Ferengi said then. "Now, ten minutes are up and there are plenty of other customers out there. Shall we discuss about the payment now?"

* * *

Kathryn lay on her bed and stared the ceiling. She hadn't still succeeded to shake of the vivid images of her experience, which had been on her mind all day. It had felt so real. His kisses, his touch… her own needs and desires. It had felt so real. In all the vividness of her experience she had actually started to wish that some of it had happened to her. It had been a long time since she had felt herself so fully woman as she had felt when he had touched her. She wanted him; she truly wanted to make love to him.

Kathryn closed her eyes. If she concentrated, it was almost possible to feel his hand on her, his breath against her skin, his lips on her neck and mouth. She turned on by just thinking about his hand between her legs. He had been so demanding, so full of need she had felt as well. Kathryn couldn't help herself from placing her own hand on the black lace where she now imagined him touching.

Suddenly her computer beeped on the table next to her bed. Kathryn opened her eyes, collected her thoughts and activated the computer.

"Hi", the man on the display greeted.

"Chakotay…", Kathryn managed to say.

"It's late. Why aren't you sleeping?"

"I almost was", she told.

"Want to come for a cup of coffee?" he asked.

Kathryn thought for a moment. Should she? How would she feel being with him as a friend after what she had just experienced? It wasn't real, at least not in this timeline, but she had felt his touch nevertheless.

"I'll be right there", she said then. "See you soon."


	2. Chakotay's Turn

"It was bizarre", Kathryn confessed and took another sip from her cup. "I still don't know what exactly it was, or what to think about it."

"Could it have been something similar with the synaptic stimulators the Equinox crew used?", Chakotay suggested. "They called it "poor man's holodeck", if I'm not mistaken."

"I don't know. But it felt so real, Chakotay. And your ship, for instance? I never set my foot on it, but I saw in details. Could I really have imagined them?"

"Can't say."

"Well, I saw the schematics of your ship before we left DS9, of course, but still. The surroundings were so vivid. I touched things and they felt very real to me."

"Interesting", Chakotay admitted. "But I must say that I find it even more interesting that you ended up in this…"

"Exhibition of Extraordinary Extraterrestrial Exemplars", Kathryn continued and laughed. "Believe me; that was not my idea, but Phoebe can be very persuasive when she wants to."

"Must run in the family", Chakotay said and smiled.

Kathryn smiled too and took another sip from her cup. She glanced at Chakotay briefly and a warm sensation filled her heart. She enjoyed being with him like this; just talking without thinking about the world outside of them. It was simple and pervasive at the same time and after her experience in the "alternative past", she had started to think that maybe this was the way they should be - together.

"You were quite different there", she said then.

"What do you mean?"

Kathryn smiled. "Well…", she started and her smile widened. "I saw a different side of you."

"You cannot hold a man responsible of things he does in alternative timeline", he joked and smiled.

Kathryn laughed and shook her head.

"What?" he asked.

"Oh nothing."

"It is obviously something funny and it most certainly has something to do with me, so let's hear it."

"Nothing", she said again. "Forget it."

"How was I different exactly?"

"Chakotay!"

"You started this so I think I am entitled to know more."

"Well, you were… cheekier than I have learnt to see from you."

"Cheekier?"

Kathryn laughed. "Yes; that is the word I would use."

"What exactly happened there?" he asked then and watched her under his brows.

"I told you already."

"You told me about it on very general level. But now that you just described me as 'cheeky', I want to know what it means."

"Well, you were, in that particular timeline, a little more… playful than usual. And I was NOT a first officer on your ship, I can tell you that. At least not in that particular time."

"Like I already said; you cannot hold a man responsible about things he does in alternative timeline", Chakotay reminded and smiled.

"Oh, I bet you have that side in you", she said. "You just haven't let it show that much."

"Really? I bet if I were to try that thing, I would see another side of Kathryn as well."

"Perhaps, but only if that alternative timeline would be the one where our paths would have crossed."

"I think we were meant to meet in any timeline."

"Maybe", she said and winked. "But overall it was really strange experience."

"So it seems."

"You should try it yourself", she said then.

"What?"

"I think this is a three-day exhibition. You should go there and try it, too."

"Hmm…"

"This could be a unique opportunity", she reminded with a smirk. "And you could see another side of me, if I were a part of your alternative past."

"True. So if I try it, are you going to tell me what exactly did you mean by me being cheekier?"

"If you try it yourself", Kathryn started and watched Chakotay mysteriously. "I will tell you mine, if you tell me yours."

Chakotay put his cup on the table and leaned towards her. "It's a deal."

"Alright."

"Alright. We go to the exhibition tomorrow, then."

"Okay."

"So, prepare to give me full report about the meaning of the expression "cheekier"".

Kathryn laughed. "Very well", she said then.

* * *

"You are back", the Ferengi said once seeing Kathryn outside of his tent again. "And you brought a friend."

"I am", Kathryn said. "We would like to try your device again, against reasonable compensation, of course."

"Of course", Ferengi replied with a wide smile that exposed his grainy row of teeth. "Come in, please. You are my first customers of the day."

Kathryn and Chakotay exchanged looks and followed the Ferengi inside the tent. They seated by the same round table than Kathryn had yesterday, and the Ferengi picked the device up on the table again.

"This device is said to be originated…", the Ferengi started, but Kathryn quickly cut him off.

"We know", she said. "He knows. He wants to try it."

"Fine", the Ferengi said and gave Chakotay the headphone/visor part of the device. "Place this on your head."

Chakotay took the strange looking construct in his hands and placed the thing on his head.

"Where would you like to go?"

"You were five years in the past?", Chakotay asked Kathryn.

"Yes."

"Alright. Let's see what has happened four and a half years ago", he said then.

"Have a nice trip", Kathryn said, smiled, and tapped him gently on his arm.

Chakotay smiled and nodded. And the next thing he knew was blinding white flash in his eyes.

* * *

Chakotay looked around. He was on Voyager, in his own quarters.

"I'll be damned…", he whispered. "Computer, what stardate is this?" he inquired.

"_50333.1_", computer declared.

"50333.1…", Chakotay repeated and started to think. He tried to remember what had happened during those times and what hadn't. It was clear they weren't in the Borg space yet, but they weren't exactly within the reach of Kazon either. "Computer; is there a 'mobile emitter' onboard", he asked then.

"_Affirmativ_e".

"Define the concept of mobile emitter".

"_The mobile emitter is an autonomous self-sustaining mobile holo-emitter used by The Doctor, The chief medical officer onboard USS Voyager_", Computer told.

Chakotay nodded. So The Doctor was already gotten his freedom outside of sickbay, but if he remembered correctly, he hadn't had that particular device for long time.

"Computer", he asked again. "What time is it?"

"_It is 0653 hours_", computer told.

Suddenly Chakotay's door chimed. "Come in", he said and waited curiously what was about to come.

The next thing he saw was Kathryn Janeway walking in. Chakotay wasn't able to contain his smile. There she was, in her old uniform and her hair in ponytail, and marching directly to his replicator. Chakotay was a little bit puzzled by her casual behavior, but he didn't resent it at all. He liked to be around her, in any timeline.

"Coffee, black", she ordered.

While the cup was materializing she looked at Chakotay and became perceptibly surprised by his intense and curious eagle eyes that were directed to her.

"What is so funny?" she asked.

"Oh, nothing", Chakotay told.

"You are smiling", she said. "And you are looking at me in a funny way. What is it?"

Chakotay's smile widened. Kathryn had been right when saying that this experience was very realistic. This certainly was. He was with her, in the past, and he remembered the current time very vividly now. He remembered Kathryn as she appeared in his eyes now. So much had happened since then, they both had changed both inside and outside.

"Nevermind. What's on your mind?", he asked then.

"I think we must finally tell the senior staff about this current situation", she said then. "And I mean today, during our morning briefing."

Chakotay was about to ask what she meant, but he quickly realized that he shouldn't expose himself. It was wiser to let her reveal what was going on.

"Oh?" he asked instead.

"I'm getting bigger so fast these days", she said then. "Look at me, Chakotay. My uniform does not really cover my stomach anymore, even though I have already replicated a bigger size. I want them to know before rumors start to circulate onboard."

Chakotay looked at her stomach. For a moment he did not understand what she meant, until he realized that her midsection was indeed a little bit rotund than he had seen her to be before. Was she pregnant? Chakotay swallowed. Was Kathryn with a child?!

"I don't know how they are going to take it", she continued, "but I think we cannot hide this much longer."

We? Had she just said 'we'? Chakotay's jaw dropped and his heart missed a beat. She was obviously pregnant, there was no doubt about it anymore, but he was the father? How had that happened? And when? And what kind of relationship did he have with her in this timeline? Were they lovers? Or had she conceived in more artificial way, and confined to him? Was he just a friend with whom she shared this? Or was the father someone else? Chakotay's heart froze. He didn't like that possibility at all.

"Oh…", he finally managed to say.

Kathryn placed the cup on his table and stepped to him. Then she leaned toward him and placed her cheek on his chest. Chakotay held his breath. This was certainly something he did not experience in his own timeline. And the gesture most definitely suggested that the child was his, and once he realized this, he felt suddenly a lot better, relieved, even.

"How do you feel about this?" she asked then.

"About what exactly?" he asked in order to make her tell more about the events in her timeline.

"The crew being told about this."

"Well…", he started and tried to think about how to continue. "I guess this is something that they would find out eventually anyway."

"I am surprised we have managed to keep this to ourselves this long", she said and lifted her face towards his. "But I truly think our time is up."

Chakotay tried to say something, but all words were lost. He just looked at her eyes and wished she wasn't able to see how surprised he was. He was the father that much he knew for certain now. There was no doubt about it, no room for any other possibility.

"What's wrong?", she asked then.

"Nothing", he said.

"You are looking at me in a strange way again."

"I am?"

"Yes", she said and lifter her brow. "You are acting funny this morning and I want to know why."

"Well", he started and tried desperately think what to say next. "I… I have had a peculiar morning."

"How so?"

"Umm…", he mumbled. "Well… I guess I didn't sleep all that well."

"Well", she stated and pressed her face again his chest. "I guess after we have told them about this, I should tuck you in for now on, and make sure you sleep better. At least for now. After the birth we may not get a lot of sleep."

Chakotay's eyes widened and he held his breath. Had he just heard her right? But of course they would share the quarters, if they were to become a family. It was the way it should be. It was just so unlike his own time on Voyager that it was inevitable that he was puzzled about the mere idea of sharing a bed with her.

"That would be… amazing", he said then.

Kathryn laughed. "Hold me tighter", she requested then. "We have to leave in a minute."

Chakotay surprised again. He was not accustomed to be with her like this, even though he had no objections to become more intimate with her. He adored her. Nevertheless he felt a little awkward to take her deeper in his arms, even though holding her was something he had always wanted to do more than he had been able to. But now… this Kathryn in his arms truly lived another live than his Kathryn was. Here she had decided to let him in and they were having a child. Chakotay pressed her tighter against himself. Then he smelled her hair, even though it felt like intruding a little. But she was expecting him to be more intimate, and for once it was alright to show how much he cared, how much he had affection for her within his heart.

"Oh this feels good", he heard her whisper.

"It does", he confessed and longing he had repressed for a long time filled his heart. It was a strong sensation, much stronger than he had anticipated.

"But we must go now", she said then and stepped away from him.

"Kathryn", Chakotay said then without even thinking about it further. Her leaving from his embrace like that made him want to reach her again.

"What?", she asked and smiled.

Chakotay took her hand and pulled her against himself again. He looked deep in her eyes until took her face between his hands and placed a kiss on her lips. She returned to it willingly and quickly the kiss deepened. Chakotay turned on. He felt an aching need growing between his legs. He wanted her like he had always wanted. He needed to express his feelings, which had not had a change to manifest themselves in a full bloom in his own timeline. He wanted her so much. He wanted to lower her pants and touch her hidden place, which had been in his mind more than he was able to remember. Part of him demanded him to stop, to not taking advance of her like this, but part of him encouraged him to continue, since she was more than willing herself, and she also wanted him to do this.

"Stop", she finally managed to whisper. "We are expected on the bridge."

"I know…", he said and continued caressing her by kissing her neck. She smelled so good and he wanted to keep her like this, close to him, so he could feel her being only his. He didn't want to share her with anyone anymore. He had done that for much too long.

"Oh honey…", she sighed. "I want you so much, too, but we'll have to wait for tonight."

Tonight. Chakotay knew he wouldn't have the time. This experience would be long gone before the night started.

"You are a little funny this morning", she said then. "You are kissing me like this was the last time we see each other. Or the first time in a long time."

"It feels like that to me", he said.

"Why?" she asked and kissed his chin.

"I don't know", he lied.

"I love you so much, Chakotay", she said then and the words made his knees weak.

"I love you too", he said then, meaning every single word of it, and took her face in his hands again. "I have never loved anyone like you, and I never will. Remember that."

* * *

"Then there is one final thing", Kathryn said in the end of the table and placed the padd in front of him. Chakotay knew the moment had come. "Something of an announcement", she clarified.

"What is it captain?", Neelix asked.

Kathryn laced her fingers together and sighed. Chakotay knew this was difficult for her, but it was necessary. He felt his own anxiety growing as well. Here he was, among the senior staff, Neelix and Kes, who were about to know about a thing that would inevitably change the dynamics among the crew for good.

"I must inform all of you that I am almost six months pregnant", she finally said and everyone from the senior staff looked absolutely astounded.

"Excuse me?" The Doctor, whose presence in the briefing was still somewhat new. "Why wasn't I informed about this?"

"Doctor…", Kathryn started, but she was quickly cut off.

"Captain, pregnancy is not anything to toy with. I should have had monitored your condition from the minute you realized you were with a child!", he explained seriously. "Not to mention your extremely bad habits; skipping lunches, drinking coffee, working under a tremendous stress all the time…"

"Doctor", Chakotay raised his voice and finally the holographic man silenced.

"Since when have you been pregnant exactly?", Tom dared to inquire.

"I became pregnant during our final days on New Earth", she confessed. "The planet Commander and I inhabited nearly four months."

Harry's goofy smile widened, Tom's jaw dropped. B'Elanna's face was in full shock, and Chakotay tried his best not to show his own surprise. New Earth! She had been conceived on New Earth. They had become lovers then. But only in this timeline, and the moment Chakotay realized this, he felt an utter disappointment.

"This is wonderful news, Captain", Kes told. "I am very happy for you both."

"Just wonderful!", Neelix yelled out with his eyes sparkling. "Wonderful! As a moral officer, I must suggest we have a party tonight! What do you say?"

"Sounds good to me", Harry told.

"Congratulations", Tuvok stated calmly.

"Thank you Tuvok", Kathryn said with a smile.

"Congratulations, captain", B'Elanna managed to say. "And you too, Chakotay."

Chakotay nodded. He saw from B'Elanna's eyes that she was absolutely dumbfounded, maybe even more than the others in the briefing room. But the next thing he knew was bright white light flashing in his eyes. For a moment he wondered what was going on, until he saw a Ferengi in front of him again.

"Wow", he managed to say once he handed the headphone/visor construction back to the Ferengi.

"Well?", Kathryn, _his Kathryn_, asked.

"Wow", he said again, since it was the only word he was able to say.

* * *

"Well?" Kathryn asked again when they walked arm in arm between the booths and tents. "Where were you?"

"On Voyager", he told.

"You were?"

"Yes. Kes was still onboard, The Doctor had just gotten his mobile emitter", he continued. "It was very familiar. And realistic as you claimed it to be."

"Was there anything different or was it our timeline?" Kathryn asked. She was a little disappointed that Chakotay's experience sounded much more familiar with their own timeline than what she had seen during her experience.

"You tell me yours and I'll tell you mine – is that how we agreed?" he asked then.

"Yes, that is how we agreed", she said. "But I start to wonder if that's a fair bargain, since your experience sounds anything but peculiar."

"It wasn't our timeline, Kathryn, believe me", he said then.

"So there was something different in there?"

"Most definitely."

They sat down on the bench and Kathryn waited him to continue.

"Tell me", she asked.

"You were pregnant", he told then.

"What?" she asked with her eyes wide open.

"You were with a child and you decided to let the crew know about it in a morning briefing."

"Oh", she said. "So I guess it was quite a surprise for all of you."

"Not so much for me as for the others… "

"Excuse me?"

Chakotay smiled and looked away. He felt awkward, but he decided to tell her all.

"It was my child, too", he said then.

Kathryn's facial expression turned from amusement into a total shock. "It was…?", she whispered then.

"You, or that other you in that past, told that she was conceived on New Earth."

Kathryn's heart skipped a beat. She felt confused, but there was also a part of her, which liked what she had just been told, which enjoyed the possibility of such timeline existing.

"Wow", she said then.

"Wow indeed", Chakotay agreed.

They sat side by side for a moment without saying anything. Kathryn felt a smile emerging on her face and a new kind of shyness started to invade her consciousness.

"Your turn", Chakotay said then and Kathryn smiled.

"Fine", she agreed reluctantly.

"I wanted to hear about the cheeky me", he reminded.

"Alright, alright", Kathryn said and looked away.

"So?"

"Well, like I said, you were quite different in that timeline", she said then. "And you…"

"Yes?" he asked and watched her under his brows with a smirk.

"You… umm… for some reason you had started to…", Kathryn said and pondered how to explain her experience as neutrally as possible. The way she had participated to Chakotay's games in the other timeline was a little embarrassing to confess, especially because she had enjoyed doing so, and she had let it happen - willingly.

"What?" Chakotay asked as his smile widened.

"You were quite eager to…"

"Yes?"

"… to get me to spend my nights in your bunk", Kathryn managed to say and felt her cheeks getting warmer.

"Really?"

"Yes…"

"How eager?"

"Chakotay…", Kathryn whispered shyly.

"Well did you?"

"Chakotay!"

"I want to know."

"I'm sure you do", she said and looked at him slightly smugly.

Chakotay laughed. "I'll be damned", he said then.

"And someone hated me because of all the attention I got", she added then.

"Really? Who?"

"Seska", Kathryn told and looked Chakotay in the eyes.

"She was there?"

"In her full Bajoran form. She was jealous, because of… how you and I interacted."

"She was?"

"She wasn't very happy that you were… should I say… 'relatively determined' to start certain kind of 'co-operation' with me."

"Well that is certainly one way to describe it", Chakotay said and laughed.

Kathryn laughed as well. She felt the awkwardness loosen up a little, but she still felt a little shy to describe her experience to him.

"Well", Chakotay said then. "It seems to me that if some other 'version' of me from another timeline ever tries this kind of device and ends up in this timeline, he would be quite disappointed."

"Really?"

"Why wouldn't he be?"

"Well", Kathryn started and lowered her voice. "This timeline certainly lacks certain things."

"It wouldn't be too late to fix these... certain things", he said then and those words made Kathryn's heart beat faster. She hadn't expected him to be so blunt, but at the same time she appreciated it. They had evaded certain aspects in their relationship for a long time, and she had already learnt not to expect them to acknowledge these things between them at all.

"I guess not", she finally whispered.

"So, how would the cheeky Chakotay tell you to get up on this bench and follow him to his apartment?"

Kathryn smiled. "I think he wouldn't even ask", she said then.

"Really?"

"I think he would just tell me to do so. But I wouldn't necessarily believe him or the genuineness of his intentions."

"Oh?"

"He can be quite a tease."

"He can?"

"Oh yes. He likes teasing without pleasing."

"I don't think that's possible", he whispered.

"He was cheeky", she reminded.

"I think he must have assumed that he had all the time in the world, but the poor thing hadn't really figured out yet what it means to wait something, or someone, special for years."

"So you think he was wasting time?"

"When an opportunity presents itself, you take it without any hesitations. And that is the lesson he obviously hadn't learnt yet."

"You shouldn't dismiss Kathryn's part of it. She can be very stubborn, especially when it comes to certain handsome man she finds quite charming."

"I'm sure she wasn't willing to give in easily. But it was certainly another story in my experience. That Kathryn had already crossed some significant boundaries. And that's why I kissed the other you during my experience", he confessed and looked her in the eyes.

"I kissed the other you too during mine", she told. "Because that Chakotay had crossed some boundaries, too."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"I'm surprised you did that."

"I don't think you are."

"I am."

"Well, you shouldn't", she whispered.

"I think our experiences practically force us to kiss in this timeline as well."

"I think you're right."

"Well, come here, then", he asked softly.

"Me? You come here", she demanded softly with a smile on her face.

Chakotay took her face in his hands and pulled her against him. Then he kissed her softly, but passionately. He wanted to taste her like he just had been in another timeline, to show her how much he wanted to be with her and love her.

"Hmm…", Kathryn managed to say when their kiss broke. "I must say that I have experienced this before."

"Me too."

"What did you say about your apartment, again?" she asked then.

Chakotay smiled. "I would say that we should get there already", he told then. "It is reasonable to assume that the other me has been a father over four years now, and I cannot let him outdo me."

Kathryn laughed and placed her arm against his chest.

"There is the cheeky Chakotay again", she whispered then. "I knew he was in you. In fact I just told you so."

"I never fully denied his existence", he reminded and touch a strand of her hair that glowed red on the sunlight. "All I need is one irresistible Kathryn in sight, and I can be as cheeky as I can get."

"That sounds promising."

"Well, let's get out of here and I might show you the rest of the tricks you still no nothing about."


End file.
